Hello friends/fellow bloggers/general public readers,
If you are reading this, chances are, you have most likely expended every option and given up on all forms of entertainment completely...otherwise you would not be here. My blogs hold no value, they have no intellectual advancements, and contain no subliminal messages or underlying meaning. What you read is what you get. Yet, with the brutally honest truth now out squirming and flailing all over your newly painted, newly polished mahogany table it is safe to say I am not completely "there." I have been told on multiple occasions that I have many metaphorical screws loose in my head. You call it crazy, they call it insane, I call it artistic, my mother calls it "special." I however embrace this trait like a father embraces his son, by hugging him and giving him a snow cone after his first little league game. For I fortunately was graced with the vigorous ambition to write. And with new wave media constantly bitch slapping me in the face it was rather difficult for me not to become absolutely infatuated with the entire "blogging" craze. I attempted to stay away and distance myself from new wave media (such as social networking) like it was a cheap hooker on a New York city street corner who had an encyclopedia of STDs, but just like the hooker to no avail could I resist the temptation. The idea and act of being able to write what I want, when I want and distribute my radical and politically incorrect opinions to the masses just seemed extremely compelling to me.
If you have not already realized, I do not have a censor button. I do not believe in censorship nor do I approve of it in any form of media anywhere in the world. My head does not censor itself, therefore why should my blog? With that have been said, I have immense respect for various cultures, beliefs, and lifestyles. You will NEVER see me bash or degrade an individual, form of media, or piece of art based on those circumstances. I will also never force my views upon you (my viewers) you can take my writing for what it is worth to you.
I should probably wrap this up soon.....I do not exactly know what a standard size for a blog is, yet, presumably you are in somewhat of a fetal position at this very moment crying over the precious lost minutes that you have just wasted reading this sham of rubbish that I happily call a "blog"
WHAT YOU SHOULD EXPECT FROM ME: In MOST of my blogs I will review a band, and a movie in great detail along with another completely unrelated subject. Some of the bands and movies I review will be obscure, while others I review will be more common and prominent. I will take requests for movies and music that you may want reviewed and I will always be happy to comply.
WHAT I WILL EXPECT FROM YOU: ...Nothing really. I do however, appreciate feedback (whether that feedback be positive or negative) and a strong interactive relationship between you (the viewer) and me (the so-called "blogger")
Now before I finish my first official blog, and leave you with a tasteless feeling in which you have the urge to slap a pregnant panda bear and a compulsion to ransack a tiny, uncivilized village, you are probably wondering what you should refer to me as. In the circumstance that you do feel compelled to tell your co-workers what a scrub I was or your school mates on how you wasted all of 8 minutes of your life reading my shitty blog before proverbially touching yourself, your going to want to shout my name to the heavens in anguish, then quickly follow my name with controversial words or sayings that are usually not condoned by the rest of organized society. The answer is simple my friends, just call me "That Guy" or "Guy" for short. I have come to the conclusion that all great bloggers/musicians/artists have cool "pen names." Now granted my name is very typical and by most not considered cool but it is memorable and makes for an easy flow when stringing it together with a party list of swear words. Now you may be wondering "but guy, what if I want a cool pen name as well?" Oh ho ho! Ask and you shall receive my friend! Instead of simply referring to you as a "viewer" or a "reader" I felt it was only appropriate to refer to you as Dogma. Dogma is the established belief or doctrine held by a religion, ideology or any kind of organization: it is authoritative and not to be disputed, doubted or diverged from....so take it for what it is worth (plus it sounds super-bad-ass)
If you wish to talk, question, insult, mock, thank, provoke, or criticize just simply comment on any one of my blogs. I will blog regularly and hopefully entertain you through-out most of them. Until next time Dogma...
Sincerely, That Guy
0 comments:
Post a Comment